Last Post-Placement Visit

We had Anna's final post-placement visit on Thursday!  Which means, our lawyer can now set a court date.  Which means, in about a month (because apparently our lawyer is pretty prompt as he should be for the amount of money we paid him) and Anna will be legally adopted!  It also means that we have written out our last check for this adoption.  We joke with Anna that now we're done "paying her off."

I think about her adoption day a lot.  I want to celebrate it in a big way.  I can't wait for it to get here.  I can't wait to have that piece of paper that legally list her name as Anna instead of Baby Girl.

However, nothing will actually change on that day for our family.  She won't be any more OUR daughter than she was before.  She won't be any more a part of our family, she always has been a part of our family and she always will be, legal adoption or not.  So it's kinda hard to explain why I'm so excited for it.  Maybe it's because at that point the state recognizes her as our daughter.  At that point, there is no one that will come to our house every month to make sure we're fit parents (as much as we love our case worker, it's kinda irritating to have to be "checked-up on" but it's the law so we gladly oblige).  At that point, we are finished paying for her adoption, no more surprise court fees, no more lawyer fees, no more homestudy fees or adoption checks or anything else.  No more strings attached.  That's the kicker I guess, she's free to simply be our daughter forever and for always.  No longer is she binded to the state on paper. 

And it's at that point that legally we can begin the proces of adopting again.  Yeah, I'm also excited for that aspect of it.  The "permission" to have another child. 

I guess sometimes the system seems a little backwards because my husband and I have to jump through 4,000 hoops in order to have a child and meanwhile the state has to check and make sure we've crossed all our t's and dotted all our i's and we've paid them enough money and we've made sure our vitamins and medicine are in a locked box and we've provided enough square footage for our child.  And there are people who live recklessly and get pregnant all the time and have nowhere to live and don't have the means or the desire to care for their child(ren) or simply see them as a burden and decide that child shouldn't live at all and abort them or abuse or neglect their children.  Where are the case workers checking up on them?  How come they can have children with no hoops?

So really I didn't intend to rant.  I feel beyond blessed that we have had the opportunity to grow our family through adoption.  I'm thankful for our infertility because otherwise we wouldn't have our daughter, Anna.  And I wouldn't trade her for the world.  And I think all of the hard work, money, time, etc... we spend trying to have children makes us appreciate her and our future children even more and ultimately brings us closer in our faith.