Dumpster Dive Nativity Scene

So on the day that we first got our exciting phone call, Jeremy reminded me that Advent is a really appropriate time to be expecting a baby.  We found out just before Advent started and we will spend the majority of Advent preparing not only for the birth of our Lord, but also for the birth of our child.  It is a very neat parallel and a really cool chance to reflect on Mary and Joseph's journey at that point (without the very large belly and donkey ride).

Fast forward to yesterday when we went to meet S. As we were driving out of the neighborhood, we spotted something on the side of the road, a pile of "giveaway" Christmas items.  Among the items were a light up nativity scene (Jesus, Mary and Joseph) for outdoors.  Yeah, that's definitely on the top of my dumpster dive finds!!! We had wanted one but they're kinda pricey... So of course we picked it up, but we didn't have time to stop at home and drop it off.  So Jesus, Mary, and Joseph hung out in our backseat through our whole day.  We asked for Mary and Joseph's intercession and of course for Jesus' divine blessing on our meeting and we not only had them there in spirit and love, but also physically in plastic form in the car.  Needless to say, it was a constant reminder of our spiritual preparation for the coming of Christ and the birth of our son (that gives me goosebumps to say).

So here is a picture of our dumpster find, a for-free nativity scene and yes there is a baby Jesus, but it's Advent, so we're preparing for his coming.  He'll make his appearance on Christmas at about the same time that our son makes his appearance to in our home.

IT'S A.....

BOY!

Disclaimer:  For those of you that were hoping for a phone call, I'm just going to say that we are 100% exhausted from a very emotionally and physically draining day... So a blog post will have to do, and I apologize in advance it if is not very coherent...

Okay, now on to the good stuff!  We got to meet with our birthmom today who I'm just going to call S for the sake of this post and the fact that I don't want to type out birthmom over and over again.  It was wonderful to meet her and get to know her a little bit better.  It is truly a unique experience to get to meet the mother of your child!  I had all kinds of preconceived notions going into it and I can honestly say none of them were even close to correct. And we also got the exciting news that she's having a boy!!!

It was a wonderful chance for us to understand her story and what led her here now.  S gave us some wonderful insights into her life and her choice to make an adoption plan.  I have to say her reasoning and intentions are so carefully thought out and planned that I couldn't help but feel comforted by her.  So all in all, it was an effective meeting and a great chance for her to get to know us better and us to get to know her better.

She also asked me if I would be in the room with her during her scheduled c-section.  Due to health reasons, they are going to schedule one and it'll probably be in about 3 weeks, most likely the week before Christmas.  I was super excited about this, it definitely made me cry!!!  She also told us that she would like us to be at the hospital as much as possible and she would like us to be the ones to take the baby home (instead of interim care).  So these were all things that we were super thrilled about.  She also chanted, "You're gonna have a baby" to us multiple times :-)

We also were very curious about what it was about us that made her choose our profile.  S told us that she really picked us because she wants an ongoing relationship with the child and that was something that we clearly stated in our video.  She wants to have a chance to be a part of his life while giving him the chance to be raised by people who can give him the life that she wants for him.  So that was touching and she said that all of them cried when they watched our video and she knew the moment she saw it that we were going to be the parents of her child.  (Again, it made me cry)

The one thing that has yet to be nailed down is a name, there was some conflict here as she had a name in mind and so did we and they're like not even on the same planet of name choices...  So Jeremy and I think we've come up with a solution that will appease everyone (and we REALLY like) but I guess we won't know for sure until we talk with her again!

I would just like to ask a favor of everyone at this point...  Please pray for the health and safety of both S and baby.  At this point she's really close to the soon to be scheduled due date and she could use all the prayers you can give her, she has already become a part of our family and no matter what happens, she will always hold a special place in our lives, so I'd appreciate your prayers for her and the child that she's caring for.

Thankfuls

Update:  Yeah, apparently I can't spell...  Thanksfuls???

There are an unlimited number of things that I am thankful for.  However, for time and space's sake, I'll narrow it down to the ten most important:

1) OUR HOME - I'm thankful for a roof over our heads and a wonderful place that our children will be able to call home and always feel the warmth and comfort of our love.

2) FOOD - I always try to be thankful for the things in life that we take for granted.  I'm so grateful that I have the luxury of putting food on the table whenever I want!

3) JOBS - We always have to count our blessings with Jeremy's good job and my ability to kinda do whatever I want :-).  In a month that will be a stay at home mom and I am sooooo grateful to my husband for this opportunity.

4) LUXURIES - There are so many luxuries in our lives that I am thankful for.  I won't list them all for you, but many of them are small, many of them are huge, and I am so grateful that we live in a society where there's freedom and rights and we can express who we are and what we want to be in a very real and unjudged manner.

5) FRIENDS - I am so thankful for our amazing group of friends.  They constantly help us to grow in holiness, they are always there for us with good things and bad things.  They support, love, and help us in any way, shape or form.  We are so blessed with an abundance of good, holy people in our lives that we are grateful to call friends.

6) FAMILY - We have amazing, wonderful, supportive families and we enjoy each and every minute that we spend with them.  We are so blessed in this area and are so thankful for each member of our immediate and extended families.  They truly have shaped who we are and we have learned valuable life lessons from them.

7) THE CHANCE TO GROW IN HOLINESS - Through our infertility.  Without this opportunity, we never would have had the respect for birth families, we would have continued judging them.  We would never have the opportunity to grow our family in a very unique and very special way.

8) BIRTHMOMS - I'm so thankful for this group of women who choose life for their child, while knowing that they can't provide for them.  They truly make the ultimate sacrifice of love and I'm thankful to one in particular whose name I don't know yet and whose child I have not yet met, but hope to be a mother to very soon.  I am so thankful for her selfless gift of love and the chance to meet her and understand her.

9)  MY HUSBAND - He is such a wonderful, amazing person and I am grateful each and every minute of the day for him.  He is so patient, hard working, loving, and selfless.  I couldn't do it without him and I am so grateful for him.

10)  MY CATHOLIC FAITH - I'm so thankful for the opportunity to practice my faith freely and wholeheartedly. I'm thankful for being able to live in the Truth of Christ's presence each and every day and to have the chance to grow in holiness each and everyday.

It's no conincidence...

It's amazing to me how much motivation our recent good news has given us.  All of the sudden there are things we NEED to get done and we WANT to do them!  

We were  kind of in an emotional funk as of like a week ago.  It is very draining to try being hopeful in a situation that often seems hopeless.  However, I was reminded this week of how gracious God is and how intricately woven His plans are for us.  It is so amazing to see His plan unfold after so long of questioning if He really had one...

For instance, it is not merely a coincidence that the birth mom who identified our profile is due at the very same time that I begin my new job as nanny/stay at home wife.  It is no coincidence that we had recently taken a cloth diapering class and had built up our supply of cloth diapers.  It is no coincidence that we had finally gotten to a point in our finances where we could (more) comfortably write a check for thousands of dollars (which we will have to do on placement day).  It is no coincidence that almost a year to the day after we found out that we could not have kids, we get a phone call that will change our lives forever.  And it is no coincidence that as we enter this time of Advent, an intense time of preparation for the birth of our Lord, we, as a family, get to actively participate both spiritually, physically, and emotionally in that preparation for our own (hopefully) child.

I often simply struggle with trusting in someone else'a plan.  I like to have control over all situations and letting go of that is extremely challenging.  However in the last 6 months I have learned a great amount of patience.  I have also learned to let go of some of that control.  I'm have no where near mastered either of those things, but I have certainly made some small steps in the right direction.  It actually made me laugh when I said to Jeremy, "Wow, six months wasn't that long to wait." And he quickly reminded me that a few days ago I was saying how long six months seemed.  It's fascinating how quickly your perspective can change!

 The last few days, we have had a blast frequenting baby sections the last few days.  We have bought a few fun sleepers and a toy or two.  My parents went out and bought us a cozy carseat cover since (as long as everything goes through) we will have a baby in the cold weather!  We also have registered, since we finally have an due date and have simply enjoyed doing some of the things we wished we had a reason to do!

So please keep up the prayers, we greatly appreciate all of the love, support, and prayers of our family and friends.

I CAN'T EVEN DESCRIBE...

...OUR JOY AT THE MOMENT!!!

Yes, it's the post you've all been waiting for (of course no one more so than Jeremy and I).

It is fitting that during National Adoption Month, we are identified by a birth parent as the (hopeful) adoptive parents of her unborn child!!!!  Yes, we got our long awaited phone call today.  It went a little something like this:

Last week we had a 6 month licensing review at which point our case worker had to do another walk through of our home, inform us of any program changes, ask us some really seemingly pointless questions (for example:  "Now you know after you get a baby, you will have to feed it right? **She HAS to ask these, but how dumb is that) and gave us updates on our status within the program.  It was a very uplifting meeting as she told us that our profile had been viewed 4-5 times (about once a month, pretty good considering what we thought we were getting viewed) and she told us that we actually were in a pile of prospective adoptive parents waiting for a birth mom at the moment.  She did not know when she would pick, but (in hindsight) we think she may have had some inside information on this.  She gave us some pretty specific details and kinda led us to get our hopes up... something she generally doesn't do...

Fast forward to today...  I got a phone call from my caseworker and returned the call after school (of course, while I was still AT school).  I was in the hallway when she said "Are you sitting down?" and I shouted and burst into tears, scaring some kids and receiving some pretty strange looks...  So I talked with her for a while and all the time she's giving me lots of details and such and I'm saying to myself "Pinch me" and "I need to call Jeremy".  Once I finally got off the phone with her and had cried for a good fifteen minutes at the point, I called Jeremy.

His first response was, "You're not joking are you?"  That would be mean of me... I drove (maybe a little too quickly) to pick him up at which point I couldn't remember driving there, one of those surreal times when you're not sure how you got from one place to another and made him get in the drivers seat. We then went to tell our parents and we spent lots of time on the phone telling sisters, brothers and grandparents and lots of friends.

So, the details, that we can share (most are confidential) are:  the birth mom is due January 4 (YES, THAT IS LIKE LESS THAN TWO MONTHS AWAY, WE COULD BE PARENTS AT CHRISTMASTIME!), other than we know that we will get to meet the birth mom on Monday, November 29th and get a chance to talk with her and get to know her a little bit.  We do not know boy or girl (neither does she) and we don't know (and can't share) much about her yet.

So, keep the prayers coming.  We are praying very hard for a smooth adoption and (selfishly) that she doesn't change her mind.  Prayers, prayers, prayers please, for the birth mom, the baby, and for us!


P.S. this blog post has taken me like 2 hours to write because we keep getting fun returned phone calls!

RCIA

 After having only 4 candidates/catechumens last year for RCIA, we expected pretty much the same this year.  Don't get me wrong, they were an excellent group of candidates, fun, enthusiastic and eager to learn about the faith.  It was great for our first year being in charge.  In years before, when a staff member was assigned to lead it, the numbers grew every year.  They had time to seek people out and to spread the word.  Last year, we had virtually no way of letting others know about it and had hopes for higher numbers.  We didn't really do anything different this year, but the Sisters and Fr. L at the Center have.  I am so grateful for their diligence with regards to RCIA, they really have made it a priority to ensure a fruitful process.

We are so abundantly blessed with 10 candidates this year.  We more than doubled!  In the last four weeks we have had three new people join us.  It's November and people are still signing up as interested.  It is fantastic!  It makes me smile each week to see the "classroom" filled with people.  I make treats each week and it is becoming increasingly challenging to ensure I make enough (a very good problem to have :-)).

Aside from that we have more teachers this year, basically a different one each week and they have done an amazing job of teaching the Catholic faith.  Without them, Jeremy and I would be overwhelmed with work to do!  In addition, we have the rest of the team that leads the small groups and functions as a liaison between us and the candidates.  These small group leaders are the ones that connect with the candidates, give them a clear Catholic role model and guide them on this journey.  They each have 2-3 candidates assigned to them and these small groups yield such visible faith from the candidates.

I am just so grateful for all of the volunteers that help us with this ministry that is so vital for the growth and strength of the Church.  It is so rewarding to see the transformation of hearts and faith in just two semesters and often times I think that I get more out of it than the candidates do.  I am so glad that we were asked to be a part of this ministry.

National Adoption Month

November is National Adoption Month!! So maybe during the month of November, say some extra prayers for all of those involved in the adoption process:

~ Birth moms who face the toughest and most important decision of their life and the life of their child

~ Case workers who deal with everything from the most touching to the saddest cases you can ever imagine

~ Foster parents who care for and give a temporary home to those waiting to be adopted

~ Adoptive parents who are in any and all stages of the adoption process

~ Those discerning adoption as a means of expanding their family

~ And most importantly for the Children involved in the process whether born or unborn, especially those who are waiting and are desperately longing for a forever home


This is fitting as November also marks the point, last year, at which we began to pursue adoption.  It's hard to believe that a whole year has gone by, but last November was when we learned the devastating news that (more than likely) we will not have children of our own.  It was also the month that we prayed constantly for guidance as to what God's plans were for our future family.  It was those prayers that led us to Catholic Charities where we began our adoption process. 

The last year has been a total roller coaster for us.  We have had some extreme highs and some extreme lows.  However, I know that at some point we will be able to look back and understand it all more clearly, at least I hope :-).  I am confident that all of the mountains of paperwork, money, time, effort, tears, smiles, and sweat will be blown away the moment we become parents.  While it's hard to think about that time now as we struggle to play the waiting game, I know that it will come and that it will be great.