Hair

I've always loved doing hair.  And I've always loved having my hair done.  My sisters and I used to beg my mom to french braid our hair, in fact, if I had time to sit for that long, I'd have her do it now (I know my sisters still do :-)). 

Growing up with girls, I guess it's something that was just a part of our lives.  We were constantly disgusted by the hair in the drains, constantly trying to find the perfect brush and always looking for those hairties that disappeared so quickly.  So it's no secret that I've always wanted a little girl for many reasons, but one of those being the hair.  I couldn't wait to have a little girl's hair to braid and brush and to make bows for. 

When we brought home a baby girl last March, I was completely overjoyed.  And a little scared at the same time.  I knew how to care for and style white hair and I had a little experience doing black hair with the two girls I nannied for, but not a whole lot.  Sure, I could make their hair look cute, but to care for it on a daily basis?  I was a little out of my element.

For the first 10-12 months, I didn't really do anything special.  I didn't wash it very often, I knew that would dry it out.  I put oil in it each day, as a friend had recommended.  And I dressed it up with countless bows and headbands.  She hasn't gone a day without some kind of bow or headband in her hair.

Day 1, already has a bow in her hair.

6 months old

8 months old

12 Months old

As she neared her 1st birthday, I realized the time was here, I was going to have to learn how to really care for her hair.  So I immersed myself in blogs and FB groups.  The most helpful being Chocolate Hair Vanilla Care, a blog created by a fellow transracial adoptive mom.  I learned about a lot of great products and routines for caring for Anna's hair.  I learned what hair type she was so that I could find the best products to use and to avoid for her hair type.

I didn't start really styling her hair until about 2 months ago, but I had been trying out different products to see what worked/didn't work to keep her hair moisturized and frizz-free. 

My firest real style.  These were chunky two stranded rope twists.  They lasted for about 4 days

 At first, her hairstyles would last for about 4 days and then they'd start to look frizzy again.  I'd take them out and let her wear her hair free for a few days.

Then I'd do another style.

Box braids with barrettes.

 Most of her styles now, last about a week.  Some could last longer if I had the time and patience to redo any twists or braids that needed it, but generally I just take them out after about a week.  As she gets older, they'll be able to stay in longer.  Right now, she still does a lot of rolling around on the floor and picking up grass and leaves from outside with her hair.

Two stranded rope twists with barrettes.

Two stranded rope twists just on the front of her head, fro in the back

Box braids.

Flat rope twists.

About a month ago, I did the front in flat rope twists and the back in two stranded rope twists with hair snaps on the ends.

Same style, different week and cornrows in front instead of twists. 

Can you tell I like this style?  It's easy to maintain, holds up well to toddlerness, looks super girly and cute, and it makes it easy for me to redo one or two of the twists if they start to look bad.

 

My most recent style, corn rows with pig tails in the back and a side bang corn row in the front to make it girlier. I added bows on the pigtails in back. My corn rows turned out very well and so far this style seems to hold up extremely well to Anna's craziness.

After I take a style out, we wash her hair.  We only use shampoo about once or twice a month, unless she's rubbed spaghetti sauce or something really messy in it.  We use mostly the Kinky Curly brand products because they seem to work really well on Anna's hair.  We also co-wash about every week, again, unless it's needed more often for whatever reason.  We love their leave-in conditioner as Anna hates to have her hair run under the faucet.  We just wet her hair, put it in and let it sit. 

After it's sat for 10 minutes, we detangle her hair.  I usually run my fingers through it to make sure there are no major tangles.  Then I use a wide-toothed comb and do it section by section.  She's not really a fan of having me comb her hair because has to keep her head still.  She learned quickly that when she jerks her head away from me, it hurts!  Once we've detangled, we usually just put her sleep cap on and let her sleep on it.  Sometimes we'll let her go with the fro for a day or two, depending on schedules. 

Then when it's time to sit and do her hair, I put her in the high chair with a snack and turn on her favorite show (Mickey Mouse).  I can usually get her hair done in 2 episodes.  If it takes longer than that, I'll give her a break and come back to it later.  Usually she's begging for me to put on more MMC :-). 

I wet her hair with a spray bottle and then put a moisturizer in it.  I use a spray bottle with a mixture of water, coconut oil, and Curls Lavish Curls Moisturizer.  The coconut oil helps it become slipperier so that I can manipulate it and the moisturizer keeps her hair moisturized (duh).  So I work that through her whole head.

Then I part it accordingly.  (First I look at Chocolate Hair Vanilla Care for style ideas to figure out what I want to do).  I need to get some hair clips to clip the parts out of the way, but for now, I use barrettes which work just fine.  I then go section by section.  I put Kinky Curly Curling Custard on each section (it's a styling gel that will help hold her hair in place and seal in the moisture).  And then I style, whether it's twists or braids.  I found CHVC's tips and tricks and videos to be extremely helpful for various styles.  I finish the ends off with barrettes or my recent favorite item, hair snaps.  I'm hoping to get some beads (a co-worker of my mom is going to get some for me next time she goes to Chicago) but we just don't have anywhere here to get them.  And I hate ordering $2 beads online and paying $5 shipping, seems ridiculus!  So for now, I'm enjoying my snaps.   Anna loves them too, she'll shake her head around to hear them clink together.

Some styles I've liked better than others.  Some last longer than others.  Some I just don't like so I take them out after a few days.  The styles help maintain moisture in her hair, keep it healthy, and promote growth.  I've noticed a huge difference in her hair growth since I've been styling it!

So that my friends is my all about a white mom doing her black daughter's hair post.  Sorry it's so long, but someday I'll be able to look back and see how far I've come!  I hope this helps anyone else who is fortunate enough to adopt transracially!