Birthmom Meeting

Our meeting with the birthmom, J, went fantastically today.  We hit it off really well.  She kept repeating how much she liked us and how confident she felt in her decision.  That was good to hear.  Her mom was with her and is very supportive of her adoption play.

Basically, J knows that she can't parent.  There are some things in her life that prevent her from doing so.  But at the same time, she wants to be in this baby's life.  She expressed that she knew that if she chose to parent, the reality is that her mother would be the one to care for the baby.  Her mother does not want that responsibility as she has just hit retirement and isn't physically up to it.  J and her mother both agree that what is best for the child is an adoption plan.

And that's where we came in.  They both LOVED our video and profile.  They described us as bubbly and down to earth.  In reality, I don't feel "bubbly" but I think they meant "enthusiastic."  We'll go with that :-).  In addition to loving our video within minutes of watching it, once they saw pictures of Anna, they knew we were the family for this baby.  Anna is certainly a magnet for people.  That's a whole other post in and of itself.  If I had a dollar for every time I heard "Your daughter is the most beautiful baby I've ever seen" or "She looks like a doll", we'd have her college fund saved already. 

So anyway, back to my point.  They fell in love with Anna immediately.  They loved us to begin with and seeing her confirmed it, so thank you Anna!  This is all very humbling.  Again, a post for another day, but wow, it really shows me how God's hand is in all of this.

I can't share too many details about J due to confidentiality issues, but I can definitely say that she is a very strong lady.  And I admire her willingness to do what is best for this baby.  She definitely wants to have a part in his life, but she knows that she cannot be the parent that he needs.  She wants an open relationship and that is one of the reasons she chose us.  She wants to be able to visit and keep updated.  She wants to be able to see him grow up and have him know who she is.  Her mother wants the same.  That makes me so happy.  We don't have that with Anna and I so wish we did.  It's a really powerful thing to be able to say thank you to the woman who carried your child for 9 months.

We talked about a lot, including the hospital stay and extended contact.

But I think what I am most excited about is the name we agreed on.  In our first adoption situation, we had a major name gap.  Our name and her name were not even on the same planet.  J, however, had a name picked out that she wanted us to use as a first or a middle name.  The name was Xavier.  When she said this, Jeremy and I both looked at each other and knew we agreed.  This would be the perfect middle name.  What a solidly Catholic name!  The name we have picked out is Anthony. 

So if all goes accordingly, baby boy will be Anthony Xavier.  And that just makes me smile.  What a beautiful name for a beautiful boy.  That made us feel so at peace with this whole situation.  Something so simple really connected us and J and made us both smile at the thought of our son's name.

This post is seemingly random, my emotions have been high and my sleep has been low.  So I'm not running off of much.  I am so relieved after this meeting and yet I have more nerves than ever. 

Finally, they moved her due date up a few days.  She's now due on April 3.  They won't let her go past April 10.  We're hoping it's this week...  But that's just cause we don't want to wait two more weeks!  We're meeting her again Friday, this time at a park.  So that she can meet Anna (we didn't take her with today).  She was super excited to meet Anna, who she thinks is just absolutely adorable.  And it will be right after her doctor's appointment, so I'm excited to hear about that.

Whew, that's all I can think of for now.  I'm exhausted and going to bed.

Prayers are greatly appreciated for J, Anthony, and us as well.  Thanks, in advance!